Finding the Future
by broncomap
Summary: Kitty is looking forward to her future with Matt, after looking back at some past obstacles. Of course nothing is simple
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer - I do not own nor did I invent these characters. I neither seek nor receive any financial gain. I just like to make up stories.

This takes place at the very end of Season 19

Riding the train from St. Louis, Kitty watched the scenery go by and felt as if she'd never get home to Dodge. She knew that train travel was a marvel but right now it seemed downright slow, and seeing a flock of birds go by, she idly wondered if there would ever be a time when people could fly. She laughed at herself for such fantasy.

Having just spent a full week at a national saloon owners' convention, Kitty was eager get home to Matt. She missed him so much, and longed to feel his arms around her as she shared every detail of her trip. Matt's job took him away for days at a time, so she usually avoided adding to their time apart, but as a businesswoman she knew she had to attend the event.

Kitty fingered her gold wedding band as she thought back to a time, less then a year before, when Matt had been gone for over a month. She had been sick with worry for weeks, and when she saw him ride in, still had reason for concern. A not fully healed head wound was apparent, as was his sad and tired appearance. He had insisted they talk in private immediately, and as she sat in her room he had paced back and forth. He told her that he had followed a trail all the way to Arizona, where he was attacked and left for dead, and that a rancher named Mike had found him unconscious. Mike, he explained, was a kind woman, who had recently been widowed at an early age. When he regained consciousness, he was in her home with absolutely no memory of who he was or where he had come from. He didn't even remember his name, so Mike called him Dan.

Matt took a long pause as he paced, before explaining the rest - when Dan was feeling better, Mike asked him if he wanted to stay and he said yes. That night he shared her bed. The following day Mike found out his real identity, and called him Matt. Hearing his name brought his memory back, and he rode home to Dodge, wishing the whole way that he had regained his memory just one day sooner.

Kitty recalled the shock she had felt. She never imagined that the man she loved would sleep with another woman. Being too stunned to cry or shout, she had simply said, "I need time to think. Please leave me alone."

He was clearly distraught, but left the room, and in the days that followed complied with her request, and stayed away. Whenever she caught a glimpse of him, her heart clenched at how sad and tired he still looked as he went about his job. She went to Doc for help in understanding amnesia, and came to understand that Matt hadn't sleep with Mike, Dan had. Dan didn't know her, in fact with no memory of his past, the only things Dan knew were Mike and her ranch. That's what she had told Matt when she went to him. That and that she loved him with all her heart, and she was glad that Mike had been there to save his life.

Kitty sighed, knowing it was similar to the way Matt had been glad that Will Stambridge had been there, when vicious bandits attacked a stagecoach she was on. She had been on that stage without Matt, being furious with him for canceling their vacation because of his job. When the stage was robbed, Will protected her. She was grateful, he was charming, and when they got back to Dodge, he actively courted her. Of course, she never slept with Will, but she had gone around town with him quite openly. Will wanted her, but she knew that Matt was the only man she'd ever love, and she sent Will away.

Those events had left them more in love than ever. The flame of young love was still burning hot inside the mature love of knowing and understanding. Then disaster struck. Matt's gun arm was shot. Kitty remembered the sick feeling she felt when she saw the wound, thinking he would lose the arm. Fortunately he didn't, but his future as a lawman was in doubt. The wound was so bad that even Doc wasn't sure how much the arm could recover.

That time he had been the one to say that he needed time to think. He rode out of town, saying he'd be in touch. Matt said he didn't want to put anyone in harms way, when his enemies found out he was helpless and came after him. Kitty knew that was true, but also knew there was more to it, a lot more. She knew that Matt had always known he could be killed on the job, but being disabled was something else. If he couldn't handle a gun and protect others, a big part of his identity was suddenly taken from him.

The day he returned she was at a table in the Long Branch trying to concentrate on her ledgers. She heard the familiar footsteps and looked up as the voice she craved hearing said simply, "Hello Kitty." As his eyes met hers, she saw a deep, deep love coupled with something else, perhaps regret. She knew that she had had the same look in her own eyes when she had approached Matt after saying goodbye to Will Stambridge.

Not knowing how to express what was in her heart, she found herself saying, "Oh Matt," and then not being able to wait one second longer, stood and rushed to him. They clung to each other wordlessly, then arm in arm walked upstairs. They talked and he told her that he was going to put the badge back on. He was sure he could do the job, but there was one thing he hoped would change.

She would never forget his words, "Kitty, I've always thought that I didn't have the right to ask a woman to be my wife while I wore the badge. I never wanted to leave a widow and orphan behind the way my father did. That's been my greatest fear, and I've been trying to control the future so my greatest fear wouldn't come true. Kitty, lately I've been doing a lot of thinking about fear and uncertainty. It's taken me this long to realize that there is no point in trying to control what's to come. I love you Kitty, and I hope it's not to late to ask, will you marry me?"

Kitty smiled to herself, as she remembered being speechless with surprise. In fact she had paused for so long that Matt thought she was turning him down, and started to rise from his chair. She touched his cheek, "Matt Dillon, I love you, and want so much to be your wife."

That was just over 2 months ago. They had quickly organized a wedding, and just one week after Matt's proposal, Judge Brooker married them. They had an amazing celebration in the Long Branch, a party that folks would be talking about for years.

The sound of the train whistle brought Kitty back to the present. Looking out the window, she was pleased to see she was almost home. She'd be in Matt's arms in less than an hour. She wanted to tell him about her week and hear about his, but there was one thing she was even more eager to share. When she left for St. Louis, her period had already been long overdue. Then she started having morning sickness the morning she arrived. She was sure she was pregnant, and couldn't wait to tell Matt.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

The train from St. Louis arrived in Dodge right on time. The sun was setting as the coachmen unloaded the suitcases, and set them on the sidewalk. Kitty walked down the steps of the railroad car looking for Matt in the crowd of people who were waiting expectantly for friends or loved ones. Since he towered over everyone he'd be easy to spot, and she was disappointed that he was nowhere in sight. Suddenly she noticed Doc standing a few feet away waving his arms. He had obviously been given the assignment of meeting her, and not wanting him to feel unappreciated she quickly smiled as she walked towards him.

Doc turned to speak to a young man, and then put some coins in his hand. He was one of the locals who hung around the train depot, hoping to earn a little money by carrying luggage. The youngster picked up Kitty's suitcases and hurried off. Doc took Kitty's arm and she kissed him on the cheek. As they started to walk away from the station he asked, "How was your trip?"

She nodded, "It was good Curly, but before I tell you about it I have to ask, where is Matt and when is he expected back?"

Kitty was taken aback when she saw the dark expression that crossed Doc's face, "Kitty, let's go up to my office."

A look of fear immediately filled her eyes, "Matt's hurt. How bad?"

Doc shook his head. He had planned to take Kitty up to his office to explain the situation, but decided then and there to just spell it out, "Kitty, nobody knows where Matt is. The last time anyone saw him was when he went to make rounds a few nights ago. The next morning, when Matt was no where to be found, Festus rode out to look for him but with no trail to follow and nothing to go on, he came back hoping that Newly had found him in town, or that Matt had shown up with some simple explanation. It's been almost 72 hours since anyone has seen him. We would have sent you a wire, but we looked at the train schedule and knew you couldn't get back any sooner if you wanted to. We figured there was no point in worrying you."

Kitty shook her head in disbelief, "Doc, when Matt heads out on the trail he tells someone where he's going or who he's after. Even when he was gone for over a month and ended up in Arizona, we knew who he was chasing, even though we didn't know where he was."

Doc rubbed his mustache, "I know Kitty, that's why this whole thing is so confounding. Especially since he knew you were expected back. It just doesn't make sense that he wouldn't leave word."

Kitty looked at Doc, "Hasn't there been a hostage note, threat, attempted bank robbery, gang in town, anything?"

Doc shook his head, "No nothing, and believe me we've been expecting something along those lines. Someone who wants Matt out of the way so they feel free to commit a crime, or someone who wants to brag about being the one who killed M…." Doc stopped and looked at Kitty wishing he could take back his last few words.

Kitty's heart was in her throat, as she thought about the many years Matt had tried to avoid leaving a widow and orphan behind. Of course no one knew about Matt's baby, and she wasn't going to mention it now. She shook her head to herself and lifted her chin; she wasn't even going to entertain the notion that he was dead. He couldn't be.

Kitty looked at Doc, "I want to speak to Festus and Newly. Let's go to Matt's office."

In the office, Festus and Newly were deep in conversation when the door opened. Festus looked over, and seeing it was Kitty, stood and started explaining, "Miss Kitty, I know ya here to ask after Matthew. The last time we laid eyes on him was three nights ago in the Long Branch. We was jawin away – Matthew, Doc, Newly and me – Matthew was havin a good time when he stood up and said it was time for his rounds. Me and Newly offered to go with him, but he said we should jus stay and enjoy ourselves."

Festus couldn't meet Kitty's eyes as he added, "Me and Newly are regrettin we didn't insist, really regrettin it."

Kitty put her hand on his arm, "Matt's done rounds by himself countless times. There is no reason for either of you to feel guilty. It's just that I can't understand how he could have disappeared without a trace."

Newly looked at Doc and then at Kitty, "We've looked everywhere for signs of a struggle, tracks, blood, anything. We all know Matt would resist being taken if he could. His horse is in the stable, so we know he didn't ride out. It's like he disappeared into thin air."

The four of them stood silent for a moment. Newly spoke again, "Festus and I will go over everything. We will search every inch of this town again and again and again, until we find a clue."

Kitty nodded and tried to smile encouragingly, "I know you will. If you find out anything, anything at all, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me know right away."

Festus and Newly nodded solemnly, and Kitty turned and left the office. Doc walked out after her and took her arm, "Kitty, I'll walk you home."

She gave the slightest of nods and they headed down the street. For the two months she and Matt had been married, they had been renting a suite of rooms at Ma Smalley's rooming house. They had a bedroom, sitting room and kitchen. They figured they'd start their married life there and decide on a more permanent living space later. As Kitty and Doc walked along silently, she tried to put the thought out of her head that there might not be a later.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Matt – 72 hours in captivity

Sitting on the floor of a dark room with his hands tied behind his back, Matt blinked as he stared into nothingness.

Sometime ago he had opened his eyes, and found himself surrounded by darkness, his head exploding with pain. Trying to concentrate, he had done his best to assess the situation. He was lying on one side, his wrists were tied securely behind him, he had a head wound, didn't know where he was and it was too dark to see if anyone or anything was in the room with him. All in all not too promising. Slowly he had moved his legs and felt one foot touch a wall. Using the wall to guide him, he slowly got himself into a sitting position and leaned back against it.

There he still sat - head pounding and throat dry. He again went over what he remembered. He had been in the Long Branch with friends when it came time to do rounds. Newly and Festus, had offered to go along, but he told them to stay and finish their drinks. He had gone through his routine without incident, until he reached Jake Myers' old storehouse. Myers had bought a bigger building, and the old place had been up for sale for a few months. As always, he wanted to make sure the door was locked. He didn't want drunks, outlaws, or runaways settling in. As he started to wiggle the doorknob, the door suddenly flew open, causing him to briefly lose his balance and take a big step forward. That was when he was struck on the head from behind.

Now sitting in darkness, with no way to mark time, he had no idea how long he'd been held. The only thing that had broken the dark silence, was a visit from his captors. The door had creaked open, and one man entered carrying a lantern and a gun. A second gunman followed, and then a man carrying a tray. They never said a word and their faces were covered by bandanas. The two gunmen had kept their pistols pointed at him as the third man put the tray in front of him, untied his hands, and pointed a gun at his head. Seeing that there a bowl of soup and a canteen on the tray, he thought it could be some kind of weird trick, but took his chances and ate and drank, getting some small relief from his hunger and thirst. As soon as he finished, his wrists were again tied behind his back and he was left sitting in darkness. The trio had come only once, but the fact that they had come at all meant they didn't want him to die of thirst or starvation, at least not yet.

As time crept by, Matt realized that he had to keep his mind and body busy so he didn't go crazy being alone in the dark for endless hours. He decided to try to stand and walk, and to give himself something to focus his thoughts on.

Getting his feet under him, he managed to slide up the wall to a standing position. Turning so his left side was against the wall he started walking slowly and carefully around the perimeter of the dark room, like a newly blinded man. He gave himself the assignment of making a mental list of all the men who might want him to come to harm from his earliest days as a lawman to the present. If he managed to keep walking while doing so, he'd be getting a good amount of exercise.

Kitty

It was after midnight and Kitty was awake in bed trying with all her might to conjure up Matt, as if she could make him appear by sheer force of will. She pictured him walking though the door the way he always did when he came in very late. She'd be half asleep, and he'd come over quietly, kiss her gently and whisper, "Go to sleep honey, it's late. I love you." Of course Matt didn't appear, and a small part of her couldn't help but think that if she hadn't left Dodge to go to that convention he would be here with her, but she knew that that was as irrational as Festus and Newly blaming themselves. When she finally fell asleep, she tossed and turned with nightmares. A terrible dream about Matt dying woke her and she sat up, eyes wide open. She looked at the clock, it was 8 AM, not too early to find Festus and Newly to see if there were any new developments. As she rose and started to pull her robe on, she saw some brown and red stains on her sheets. She panicked, she had known women who had miscarriages and bleeding was a sign. No, she couldn't lose the baby. She made sure she wasn't still bleeding, dressed quickly and went to Doc's office.

Doc was busy with a patient when she went in, so she quietly slipped into the back room, and sat on the side of the bed, trying to be calm. Finally Doc opened the door, "Kitty, are you all right? It is Matt?"

Kitty looked at her beloved friend and blurted out, "Doc, I'm pregnant. I'm sure of it – probably 7 or 8 weeks. This morning I found some blood on my sheets and I'm scared."

Doc rubbed his mustache, "Kitty, are you actively bleeding, or did you just see spots on the sheets?"

Kitty shook her head, "Just dried spots."

Doc looked at her reassuringly, "Well, I've seen that in a lot of women who've then continued on with their pregnancies, and delivered healthy babies." He paused and took her hand, "At the same time, Kitty, we have to be realistic. This could be a sign that you're going to have difficult pregnancy and will have to take it easy to carry this child to term, maybe even be on bed rest. We'll see about that as time goes on, but I certainly don't want to see you on your feet working at the Long Branch while this is happening, and Kitty – I know you are a business woman and that's important to you, but you might have to let things run themselves for a while."

Kitty took in everything that Doc had just said, and responded slowly and thoughtfully, "Doc, I will do anything and everything to keep this baby, that is my priority. You and I both know that businesses don't run themselves, but I will figure something out. You can be sure of that."

Doc nodded, "Good, and I'm going to keep a close eye on you through-out this pregnancy. I think you know that. Now you go home and I'll come see you after I check in with Festus and Newly to see if there is any news about Matt."

Kitty stood up, and kissed Doc on the cheek, "Thank you Doc. I'll see you later." She started down the stairs with a heavy heart, wishing more than ever that Matt was with her, and wondering where he was. He could be hurt or even dead. She could lose the man she loved and their baby. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs and took herself in hand, reminding herself that thinking the worst never helped anything. She took a deep breath and started walking home; she had some planning to do.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Kitty 

It was late morning when Kitty slowly walked home from Doc's office, thinking about his advice. It was advice that she would without a doubt follow.

To ease her mind, the first thing she did when she arrived at the suite of rooms she and Matt had been renting at Ma Smalley's, was to go into the bedroom to check herself for bleeding or staining. She was relieved to find neither.

Sitting on the side of the bed, she thought about her life. She had always enjoyed running the Long Branch. It was interesting, challenging and goodness knows there was rarely a dull moment, but for years now she had also yearned for a home and family. Home and family had for so long been in the category of "some day," that she hadn't really thought about how it would all fit together.

Now that Doc had presented the idea that she might have a difficult pregnancy, she had to think about it. She smiled to herself realizing that she would have had to think about her pregnancy in respect to running the Long Branch in a month or so, when she started to show. Men didn't want to see a pregnant woman in a saloon, she knew that for sure.

She also knew that after giving birth, her focus would be on her baby – their baby – hers and Matt's. Of course, she'd only been sure she was pregnant for a little over a week, and hadn't had time to think about any of these things.

Now all of her thoughts pointed to the same conclusion. She needed a working partner. She didn't want to sell the Long Branch outright. She loved the business and wanted to keep her options open for the future, but right now a working partner would be ideal.

Her thoughts flew to a woman she had really hit it off with at the saloon owner's convention. Her name was Hannah, and at the convention they had exchanged knowledge, shared ideas and had a lot of laughs. Hannah was smart, experienced and had a sense of humor. She wanted to settle in the west, and had asked Kitty to let her know if any business opportunities opened up in Dodge.

Kitty stood up. It felt right. She was sure that Hannah would be a perfect partner, and decided that there was no time like the present. She walked to the telegraph office and wrote out a telegram to send to Hannah, who she knew was still in St. Louis– _Want working partner in Long Branch Saloon. Need answer fast._ Kitty Russell

After sending the wire, Kitty felt a little better. She couldn't keep her worries about Matt and the possibility of losing the baby out of her head, but she could work on the things that she had some control over.

Matt

Matt had been walking around the edge of the room, compiling a mental list of criminals who wished him ill. He wanted desperately to keep his body active, and mind working. Being light headed from lack of food and water, he would periodically put his back to the wall and slide down to a sitting position to rest. When he felt ready he'd push himself up, turn so his left shoulder was against the wall to guide him, and start walking around the perimeter of the dark room again. He was up and walking when door creaked open and his three masked visitors entered. The first man, who as usual entered holding a lantern and a guy, didn't see Matt sitting in his usual place and became agitated. Swinging his lantern about wildly he started yelling, "Where are you? Where are you?" When he saw Matt standing at the far side of the room he shouted angrily, "What are you doing over there? You aren't supposed to be moving around. It isn't allowed."

Matt had a dim recollection of the voice, but couldn't place it. He wanted to keep the man talking, "What do you mean isn't allowed? Who doesn't allow it?"

The man's face was red, he was livid and his voice rose, "It isn't allowed in solitary confinement. We gave you too much space, way too much space."

One of the others took the man's arm and said quietly, "Jerry, calm down. It will be all right. We'll fix it so he can't move around, please calm down, and don't be mad."

The man called Jerry lowered his voice but it was still filled with fury, "All right. You two sit him down where he belongs, and tie his ankles together. Give him some water, but no food, he has to learn to behave."

The men pointed their guns at Matt and motioned for him to go back to where he had been sitting. One of them tied his ankles together, and then held a canteen up to his lips. Matt drank as long and deeply as he was allowed. The canteen was removed and the two men started walking away. Jerry suddenly grabbed one of them by the shoulders, and threw him against the wall. He slapped his face saying angrily, "No more mistakes – do you hear me?" The third man put his hand on Jerry's arm, "Calm down. It was nobody's fault. Everything is all right." Jerry spit in the man's face before he turned and walked out of the room. The other two looked at each other briefly and followed.

Sitting in the dark, now unable move to a standing position, Matt at least knew who had instigated his capture. 25 years before, when he was a very young deputy in Abilene, he had come upon Jerry Dawson viciously beating up a ranch foreman. The foreman was down and unconscious, but Jerry had continued to punch his face. Matt pulled him off, but the arrest hadn't been easy. Dawson had fought hard and drawn a knife. After Matt's testimony Dawson had been sentenced to 15 years in prison. Years later, Dawson's name came up in a conversation with the prison warden, and Matt was told that Dawson had been a problem from day one. Time after time he had viciously attacked other inmates. After each attach he had been put in solitary confinement with meager rations. The time in solitary was lengthened with each infraction. Then Dawson beat up a guard, and was sentenced to an additional 10 years. Matt figured that Dawson blamed him for it all, and was retaliating by imposing solitary confinement on him. He didn't know what Dawson planned to do with him next, but figured it wouldn't involve releasing him. As for the other two men, he had no idea who they were, but they seemed young and oddly inexperienced, as if holding a gun on someone was something new.

Festus and Newly

It was early afternoon, and Festus and Newly were again going over the route Matt would have taken the night he disappeared. They went to every door he would have checked and every window he would have looked into. Again they found no clues.

Festus was frustrated, "Ya know, if either of us went missin Mathew'd have it all figured out."

Newly shook his head, "Festus, we don't know that. Matt hasn't been able to solve everything he's tried to. He'd be the first to admit that."

Festus shook his head, "Newly, I know Matthew ain't perfect, but I'll tell ya somethin, if one of us went missin – he wouldn't let it go."

Newly looked at Festus, "We won't it let go either."

Festus nodded with a sigh, "I know that Newley, I just wish we had somethin new to say to Miss Kitty."

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Kitty

Doc was at Kitty's after Festus and Newly had told her there was no news.

"Kitty, Matt is somewhere in this town, and Festus and Newly will find him. Not only that, everyone in town is on the look-out for him."

Kitty gave a deep sign, "It's been 4 days."

Doc squeezed her hand, "I know, but we'll find him. The best thing you can do right now is try to relax."

As Kitty gave him a weak smile, Doc suddenly remembered something, and pulled a piece of paper from a pocket, "Sorry Kitty, I guess I'm a little preoccupied. Barney asked me to give you this telegram. It was sent from St. Louis."

Kitty looked at it: _Working partner on her way. Eager to make a deal._ Hannah.

Doc looked at her, "Anything wrong?"

Kitty shook her head, "No Doc, it's from someone I met at the convention."

Doc nodded and kissed her cheek, "Good, I have to go now. I'll be back."

Pleased that one thing was looking promising, Kitty decided to go to her office in the Long Branch. She had already told her staff that she was a little under the weather and wouldn't be working much, but she was sure that doing a little office work would be all right. She wanted to make sure that her ledgers and papers were in perfect order to show Hannah.

Matt

Sitting in darkness, lightheaded from hunger Matt was feeling more and more disoriented. He didn't know how much time had passed, but suddenly realized that Kitty was probably back by now. The last thing in the world he wanted was to worry his wife. He smiled ever so slightly to himself, he had never thought about it before, but he liked the way it felt to call Kitty his wife. He had to find a way out of this mess.

The Long Branch - evening

Kitty entered the Long Branch and strong wave of nausea washed over her. Pregnancy was causing her to be sensitive to odors, and she realized that the smell of alcohol was another reason to stay away. Swallowing hard several times she waved hello to Floyd, who was tending bar, and hurried into her office. Inside, the smell was present but not strong.

An hour later everything was in order, and Kitty was ready to leave. As she stepped out of her office, she immediately noticed two young men who were standing at the bar. They were identical twins, in their twenties. She noted that they were wearing new looking clothes, and there was an awkwardness about them, as if they weren't used to being in a saloon."

As she stood there, Mark Davis, a local rancher walked over to her, "Maam, I just want you to know that we are all keeping an eye out for the marshal. He'll be found. Don't you fret."

A few ranch hands were standing nearby and joined in, "That's right, Mrs. Dillon. We all owe the marshal. Anyone hurts him will have to answer for it, and answer for it good."

Kitty thanked the men but out of the corner of her eye could see the twins looking decidedly uneasy. They started whispering, then without finishing their beers stood and left."

Kitty motioned to Floyd, "Who are those two?"

Floyd answered, "They've been coming in for the past week, maybe a little less. Usually they're with an older, worn looking man. He's a real mean one. After a few drinks, he starts cussing and threatening. Sometimes he even starts throwing punches. Those two calm him down, and get him to leave.

Kitty thought for a second. She had a feeling.

She smiled at Floyd, "Thanks, I'll be by again later in the week." Kitty headed straight for the marshal's office.

Festus – around the same time

Festus was on his way to meet Newly when he heard angry shouts coming from the stable. Rushing in he called for the owner, Moss, and saw that an older, tough looking man had Moss by the shoulders and was violently shaking him as he yelled in his face, "You cheat, you damn cheat." Festus drew his gun, "Mister, ya best let go and say what this is about."

The man turned, and seeing the deputy's badge on Festus' chest, took off. Festus started after him, but the man ducked down an alley, and Festus lost sight of him. Not knowing which way to search, Festus returned to the stable.

Moss shook his head, "That man is crazy. When he brought his horse in to board, I told him the price right away, like I always do. Festus, I am always real clear about the price and conditions, you know that. Well he came to check on his horse and I asked him to pay what he owed so far, and he went wild. You saw. I was sure glad you came along when you did."

Festus had a thought, "Moss, did that man come into town before or after Matthew went missing."

Moss thought for a second, "Before, just before if I remember correctly. You think he has anything to do with the marshal being gone?"

Festus hurried out, "I don't know, but I aim to find out."

The Marshal's Office

Doc was pacing back and forth speaking angrily to Newly, "You and Festus have gotten nowhere, nowhere. Maybe one of you should ride out and look for him."

Newly listened patiently. He knew how Doc felt about Matt. Hell they all cared deeply about him, and Doc was closer to him than anyone but Kitty. When Doc was finished, Newly answered calmly, "Doc, Festus rode out as soon as Matt was missing, and saw there was no point to it. There is no trail to follow. He can't just pick a direction and hope to come across Matt. I think it's better for us both to stay in town, continue to look for clues, and hope something turns up."

Doc rubbed his mustaches, "I'm sorry Newly, I know you both are trying."

Right then Festus bust into the office with a determined look on his face.

Newly jumped to his feet, "Festus – you found something?"

Festus nodded, "Maybe jus maybe. Ya know how Matthew talks about lawman's instincts. Well I got a feelin, a big one. A violent type – older fella - was at the stable, I ain't goin into no details now, but I think he maybe had something ta do with Matthew bein gone. I want us to find him.

Newly grabbed his hat, "Let's go."

Festus and Newly got outside the office and saw Kitty hurrying towards them. Newly waited until she was close, "Kitty, what is it?"

Kitty spoke quickly, "There are these men who have been coming to the Long Branch since just before Matt went missing. They are identical twins, in their twenties, who usually come in with an older man who seems real violent. It might be something."

Newly turned to Festus, "You think that might be the same man you saw in the stable?"

Festus nodded, "I'd bet on it. Let's look around. How hard could it be to find twins and an old guy with a temper?

As Festus and Newly hurried off, Doc came out of the office. "Come on Kitty, let's go to Delmonico's. I'll buy you and little Dillon dinner, and you can tell me what you just told them."

Kitty had a little hope in her heart for the first time she since got back, and took Doc's arm.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Festus - ****Early the Following Morning**

It was just before dawn and Festus was making coffee in the marshal's office. He and Newly had spent most of the night looking for the twin brothers and the older man, and as the hours wore on, the idea that they'd be easy to find evaporated, just like the men seemed to have. After visiting every saloon, searching every alley and talking to countless people, they had come up with nothing. A few hours ago they had reluctantly decided to call it a night, agreeing to meet at dawn after getting a little sleep. Festus was ready for Newly to walk through the door any second. They'd down their coffee and start looking again.

**Kitty **

After another fitful night, Kitty woke feeling nauseous. Being overtaken by morning sickness, she quickly rushed to the water room, and after vomiting felt better. She welcomed the nausea, taking it as a sign that her pregnancy was on track. After drinking a glass of water, she examined her sheets for bloodstains and to her relief saw none. Sitting on the side of her bed she pictured Matt with an infant. Years before she had watched him hold a tiny baby in his large hands. He had taken to it naturally. It had been beautiful to see, but at the same time she remembered the wistfulness she had felt, knowing that as much as she longed to have a child with Matt, it was likely one of those things that just couldn't be. Now she knew it could be. She got dressed, planning to go to the marshal's office to see if there was any news.

**Doc **

Doc was up before dawn. He wanted to visit a few patients that morning and decided to go to Delmonico's for an early breakfast. The streets were empty as he started down the stairs from his office. Looking around he let out a small sigh remembering that when he was up this early, the one person who occasionally joined him for breakfast was Matt, either because he was headed out on the trail or because he had been up all night and decided eat before getting a little sleep.

As he walked towards Delmonico's, expecting to be their first customer, he was surprised to see a man standing outside the door. He was even more surprised to see another man come out of the restaurant carrying a tray. Doc wasn't close enough to see their faces clearly, but could tell that they were young, and shared the same build and hair color. He suddenly knew that they were the twins Kitty had told him about. Not wanting to lose sight of them he followed, instead of going to get Festus and Newly. He was sure the two men hadn't noticed him and stayed a discrete distance behind. After going down Front Street, they turned a corner and Doc followed. Then they turned down an alley. Wanting to be cautious Doc didn't follow, but peeked around the corner and saw that the men were standing in front of Jake Myers old warehouse, as if they were waiting for someone.

He was about to leave to get Festus and Newly, when out of nowhere he heard footsteps coming towards him from behind. He froze, knowing it had to be the older, violent man that Festus had seen. Not knowing what else to do, he backed into a doorway, flattening himself against the door as best he could, hoping the man would walk by.

The footsteps grew louder until they stopped in front of Doc. The man turned and looked at him. With a scowl he shook his fist threateningly and spoke through clenched teeth, "Who are you, and why are you skulking around? What have you been watching?"

Doc stood absolutely still for a few long seconds. Then he took a couple of unsteady steps forward, and in his best imitation of a drunk, slurred, "Mmmister, I beeeeeen watchin my-my last bottle a wwwhiskey." With a hiccup he added, "I ddddrank it."

Doc dropped his head and shook it sadly, "I ain't got no-no-no-no more bbbooze."

The man looked at Doc thinking that his clothes looked clean for a drunk, but on the other hand he did seem totally inebriated.

Doc staggered forward and stood swaying on his feet, as he held out his hand, "Mmmister please, I need a-a-a nnnickel."

Looking at Doc, still assessing the situation, the man responded, "What do you need a nickel for?"

Doc still swaying answered, "I gotta be rready for the saloons to open. I gotta get a bbeer - mmmake me feel better."

Tossing a coin into a pile of dirt, the man watched Doc go down on his hands and knees to try to find it. The man shook his head and muttered, "pathetic," and continued on his way around the side of the building. Doc breathed a sigh of relief and waited a few seconds before rising. He peeked around the corner, and saw the older man standing with the twins. The man took a couple of bandanas from his pocket and handed them to the younger men. They all quickly covered their faces. Then the older man took out a key and unlocked the door of the warehouse, and the three men went in, closing the door behind them.

Doc waited a few seconds to make sure they weren't coming right out. Then he hurried to the marshal's office as fast as he could.

As he approached the office, he saw Festus and Newly outside talking to Kitty, and he beckoned to them as he approached. As soon as they were close enough Newly spoke, "Doc, what happened? You look like you've been crawling in dirt?"

Doc responded breathlessly, "Never mind that - I just saw them. All three – the twins and the older man, they went into Jake Myers old warehouse. I don't know how or why, but they had a key."

Newly looked at Festus, "Let's go." He turned to Doc and Kitty, "You two stay here."

As the two men took off Doc looked over at Kitty. She was moving her hand back and forth across her stomach.

"Kitty, are you all right?"

Kitty looked at him with worry in her eyes, "Doc, I'm having cramps. Is that bad?"

Doc took her by the arm and answered calmly, "Not always. Let's just get you up to my office, so you can lie down."

Kitty watched Festus and Newly hurry away, "Doc, what about Matt?"

Gently leading her by the arm, "They'll bring him back Kitty. Don't worry."

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Matt** – **day 5

Matt was half asleep when he heard the door creak. He knew the men were back for the first time since Dawson had become irate at finding him walking.

Dawson entered first, lantern in one hand, gun in the other. Matt blinked his eyes and squinted trying to become used to the unaccustomed light. The men were silent as one of them put the tray in front of him, as usual there was bowl of soup and canteen of water.

Matt tried to gather his thoughts as his wrists were untied. In his weakened and disoriented state it took some effort for him to focus his mind. All three men had guns pointed at him, but he again noted that the two men who were with Dawson seemed young and uneasy. He focused on them, "I don't know who you two are, or how you got mixed up in this, but I know this man, he's Jerry Dawson." Matt could feel the tension in the room rise, as the men realized that Dillon knew the man's identity. Matt continued addressing the two younger men, "I don't know what Dawson told you, but 25 years ago, when I was deputy in Abilene, I arrested him after he robbed a man and beat him to a pulp. The poor man's mind was never the same. Later I heard that in prison Dawson was so violent, that solitary confinement became his second home, and after he beat up a guard his sentence was extended. I figure he blames me for everything, and is keeping me in his version of solitary. I just don't know why you two are involved.

Dawson turned red with rage and smacked Dillon hard across the face. "You shut up. You'd better eat, before I change my mind and just give you water." With a sneer he added, "Don't worry I won't let you die - not yet anyway. You have a lot more suffering to do."

Festus and Newly

Festus and Newly raced to the old warehouse and were there within minutes. Rattling the doorknob, Festus yelled, "Open up." Hearing nothing he shot through the lock, and he and Newly burst through the door, yelling "Hands up." They were shocked. The warehouse was totally empty. Festus shook his head as he lowered his gun arm, "I don't git it." Newly looked mystified, "I don't either." Newly holstered his gun, "They must have come and gone pretty fast, but what were they doing here?"

Festus looked around again, "Danged if I know, but they sure ain't here now. We'd best git looking for 'em."

Newly nodded, "I agree Festus, maybe they had Matt here and moved him to another location. They couldn't have gone far though."

Matt

Matt had been a lawman long enough to be an astute reader of body language, and he could feel the uncertainty and unease growing in the two younger men. He decided to try to take advantage of it.

He lifted his spoon and leaned forward to eat his soup, it was good and hot. Then, moving as suddenly as he could, he grabbed the bowl in two hands and splashed the hot liquid up into Jerry Dawson's eyes. Dawson dropped his gun and cried out in a combination of pain and anger. Grabbing at his eyes, he started yelling, "Shoot him, you idiots, shoot."

The men seemed confused but one of them, not knowing what else to do, fired towards Matt just as he was throwing himself to the side to pick up Dawson's gun. The other twin was screaming, "STOP, STOP."

Festus and Newly

Festus and Newly were almost out of the warehouse when they heard muffled shouts and a gunshot.

Newly stopped, "Festus, did you hear that?"

Festus looked around, "Dang, it sounded like it came from some underneath place."

Their eyes were making a sweep of the floor, when Newly suddenly spotted a small brass ring imbedded in a floor tile. He rushed over and started pulling, "Festus, it's a trap door. There are stairs, let's go."

Matt

Matt had Dawson's gun pointed at the twins, and their guns were still pointed at him. He spoke to them calmly, "Why don't you drop those guns down. It's over boys, don't make it harder for yourselves."

Dawson starting yelling again, "Just shoot him damn it, just…." He stopped – he heard footsteps and turned towards the door.

Matt yelled out, "Festus, is that you?"

Festus smiled, "Sure is Matthew. Me and Newly."

They kicked the door open, and burst in with their guns drawn.

The twins looked at each other, and quietly put their guns on the floor. Matt sighed with relief as he leaned back against wall and closed his eyes for a few seconds,

Newly handcuffed Dawson, and Festus handcuffed the twins before pulling the bandanas off of their faces.

Matt picked up the canteen, took a long drink of water and then looked up at the two men. He was not surprised to see that they were in their 20's, but hadn't expected to be looking at identical twins.

He put down the canteen and asked, "How on earth did you two get mixed up with Dawson?"

The twins looked at each other again, and then one spoke, "He's our father. We were born a few months after he was put in prison. When he was released, he found us. We had a farm in Oklahoma that we were working, it was doing pretty good. We invited him to stay with us, but he said farming wasn't for him. Anyways, he kept talking about how hard he had it in prison, and we felt bad, real bad. Then he asked us to do him one favor. He said he wanted to punish the man who had ruined his life, Matt Dillon. We figured we couldn't deny him that one favor.

Festus looked at them and shook his head, "Ya didn't do him no favor, and ya sure didn't yourselves no favor."

With the three man handcuffed, Festus and Newly went to Matt, to help him stand.

He was weak and shaky, and his head wound was still apparent, but he was up and ready to walk."

Newly put an arm around Matt to help support him, saying, "Let's get you up to Doc's"

Matt nodded, "Thanks Newly. Festus, you go ahead and get those three locked up."

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Matt

As he shakily climbed up the stairs from the basement of the warehouse, Matt was surprised by how much he needed Newly's support. The past 5 days had taken its toll. He was weak from hunger and thirst, and hadn't used his legs in days. Along with that the head wound he had suffered when he was captured was still open and painful. His progress was slow, and he found himself having to rest after taking a few steps. As he stood trying to gather himself he looked at Newly, "Kitty must be back by now. I want you to be sure she knows I'm all right."

Newly was struggling to help Matt stay upright, "She is back Matt, and I'll go tell her just as soon as I get you to Doc's."

When they finally got up the stairs and out of the warehouse, Matt blinked and lowered his head as he walked out into the sun. He had spent 5 days in a dark basement, and while the sunlight was hard on his eyes, he relished breathing fresh air.

As soon as he and Newly reached Front Street, several men saw them and rushed over to help. Newly spoke up, "I know you're all glad to see the marshal, but let's have just one of you give me a hand getting him up to Doc's – Larry, you get on the other side of him."

With two men supporting him, Matt was soon at the bottom of the steps leading up to Doc's.

Doc and Kitty

Kitty was sitting in a chair in Doc's office. He handed her a glass of water asking, "Kitty, have the cramps totally subsided?"

Taking the glass Kitty nodded.

Doc rubbed his mustache, "That's good, and there was no bleeding so I don't want you to worry."

Kitty was about to respond when she heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Doc rushed to open the door and saw a weak but definitely live Matt Dillon being helped along.

Kitty looked at the unshaven, weakened man that was being helped into the room and knew that she had never seen a more beautiful sight in her life. Running to him, she put her arms around him. He held her close, but she could feel him swaying on his feet and helped him over to the examination table.

After looking Matt over thoroughly, Doc had relief in his voice, "Matt, first I have to clean out that head wound and take a few stitches, but the main thing is that we get you drinking a lot of water, and start getting some food into you. You're going to have to spend the next few days eating good meals and giving yourself time to get your strength back. Fortunately I happen to know you are married to a very good cook, but before she has at it, we'll get some food into you now."

Doc turned to Newly, "Newly, I want you to go over to Delmonico's and get some oatmeal for the marshal here."

Newly nodded and started out the door as Matt protested, "Doc – oatmeal, really? What about a steak?"

Doc shook his head, but Kitty smiled, glad to have her cowboy back.

Later that afternoon

Head stitched up, re-hydrated and oatmeal in his belly, Matt was declared well enough to go home, and he and Kitty made their way to Ma Smalley's. It was slow going. Matt was still weak, and along the way they were stopped several times by folks letting Matt know how glad they were he was safe.

Finally they got home where Matt was happy to be able to shave and get cleaned up. Then with a contented sigh he sat down on the settee and took Kitty's hand to pull her down to sit beside him. He put his arm around her, and drew her close, "All right Kitty, what have you been waiting to tell me?"

Kitty looked at him in surprise and he smiled his lopsided grin, "I know you pretty well, you know,"

Kitty looked into his eyes, "We are going to have a baby."

She watched Matt's face, relishing his expressions – the look of surprise, followed by the slow smile that grew into a wide, wide grin. The kind of smile that was rarely seen on Matt Dillon's face."

He kissed her softly, his sweet kiss turning deep and full. Then he looked at her, "I have a feeling there is more to tell."

She nodded and told him about her and Doc's concerns, the bloodstains, the recent cramps and her decision to offer Hannah a partnership. When she finished she touched his face, "You're turn Matt, I can tell you have something to tell me. I know you pretty well too."

Matt nodded, "Well that's the truth." He took a deep breath, "Kitty, you know how we've been hesitant to buy a place of our own?" He saw the expression on her face and added, "You're right, to be honest I've been the one hesitating."

Kitty smiled gently and put her hand on his, and he continued, "Well the day after you left for the convention, Bob Miller contacted me to let me know he was selling his place – you know, that nice house near the Ronnigers, the one with the big garden that you've always admired. Anyway, the Millers got some kind of inheritance and decided to move east to be closer to family. Bob knew we were thinking of getting a place and offered me a good price."

Matt paused and shook his head in embarrassment, "Kitty, too good a price really. I wanted him to raise it, but he said they wouldn't budge."

Kitty smiled at her Cowboy, "Matt, you saved their children's lives not too long ago, and got wounded pretty bad doing it. Folks don't forget those things."

Matt looked at her, "I was just doing my job."

Kitty knew he always did more than his job, but didn't want to debate the point so she simply said, "Go on."

Matt continued, "Well Bob named his price, and I knew you've always liked that place so I went ahead and bought it. Kitty, if you don't want the place, we can sell it. I just thought…"

Kitty snuggled into his chest, "Things seem to work out for us Cowboy. It's not always an easy path, but we get there. I've always loved that place, and I want it to be our home."

Matt pulled her in closer and was about to kiss her when he felt her tense up.

"Kitty what is it?"

"Matt, I'm having cramps again." She had panic in her voice as she added, "Matt I want this baby."

Matt stood up, "I'll go get Doc."

Kitty looked at him, "Matt, you're..."

He interrupted, "I'm strong enough to walk to Doc's. I'll be right back, and yes I want this baby too."

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

With Kitty suffering from cramps, and afraid that she was having a miscarriage, Matt went as fast as he could to get Doc. When they reached Kitty, she was sitting in a chair looking contrite, "Matt, I made you rush off for nothing when you're supposed to be resting, and Doc, I had you brought here for no reason. The cramps are gone already. I panicked. I'm sorry. "

Doc took her hands, "To ease your mind I want you to remember that in early pregnancy cramping can happen. As long as they are short lived, mild and there is no bleeding, it's probably nothing to worry about. That said – I want to stress, and stress very strongly that if you have the slightest, I mean the slightest, tiniest feeling that something may be wrong, you send for me."

He looked over at Matt and back at Kitty, and with a small smile added, "This is my chance to be a grandpa you know."

Matt and Kitty laughed as Doc started to leave. As he opened the door he looked back and said, "You two get some rest, and Matt don't forget – eat, and drink lots of water."

The following day

After a big dinner, a good night's sleep and a huge breakfast, Matt felt a lot better. As for Kitty, spending the night in Matt's arms left her feeling better that she had in weeks.

After breakfast they went to the train depot to meet Hannah. The train pulled in right on time, and Kitty immediately spotted her friend and waved. Hannah saw Kitty, and went over to her with a big smile. The women hugged warmly, and Kitty put her hand on Matt's arm, "Hannah, I'd like you to meet my husband, Matt Dillon."

Matt tipped his had, "How do Maam."

Hannah whispered to Kitty (loud enough for Matt to hear), "I can sure see why you were in a hurry to get home."

Matt looked embarrassed, but offered an arm to each woman, and walked them to the Long Branch so they could talk business.

Life moved on quickly from there, as the pieces of Matt and Kitty's life as a married couple expecting a child, fell into place. Hannah purchased a ¾ interest in the Long Branch. She became the presence in the saloon running the day-to-day operations, and loved it.

Matt and Kitty moved to the old Miller place on the outskirts of town, and Hannah went there regularly to show Kitty the ledgers and get her help and advise on orders and inventory.

Once she was in her new home, Kitty was surprised that she didn't miss the excitement and activity of running the Long Branch. She loved having a house of her own, and by the time she was three months pregnant, and had no more cramping, she started to relax and enjoy the experience of having a life grow inside her. As she spent endless hours decorating her house and tending to her garden, she laughed at herself for what she called her "nesting instincts."

Having no reason or desire to go into Dodge, she never went into town. She knew that that was likely to change sometime in the future, but for now she was relishing every minute of this phase of her life. She spent a lot of time with Bess and her children, Doc came by every day, and Hannah started visiting for pleasure not just business as she and Kitty became close. Friends often came for dinner, and with a better kitchen than she had ever had before, Kitty could really show off her cooking skills.

She especially loved making a home for Matt, and could see how much he appreciated the respite from his job. His job – of course that remained. He was still often in danger, still pushed himself to exhaustion, still got hurt and still was gone for days – that was part of who he was, and Kitty accepted that. When Matt was home it was good, oh so very good. She knew he loved watching her ongoing pregnancy, and loved putting his hand on her growing belly. With every movement or kick, his eyes would widen and he would smile with delight. He had promised that nothing would keep him from being there for the birth of their baby, and she knew it was true.

Yes she loved her new life. Having Matt around more was all she wished for, but knew some things couldn't be.

Epilogue – 10 months after Matt & Kitty moved and Hannah started running the Long Branch

It was late evening, and Kitty was at home nursing 3-month-old James, as she thought about Matt. He had, as promised, been there for the birth, and had taken a full week off afterwards. That week had been heaven for her. Even Bess commented that she had never seen a man, including her own husband, take so naturally to being with a baby.

Kitty smiled down at James as he nursed to sleep. She stood and placed him in his cradle, and as she tucked him in, was again struck by his resemblance to his father. As she watched her sleeping son, she tried not to think about the fact that Matt was tracking a dangerous criminal, and she had no idea when he'd be back.

Suddenly the door opened, and there he was, looking weary but unharmed. His eyes met Kitty's and he saw her worried expression before she quickly erased it from her face. She walked towards him with a smile, "Welcome home Cowboy. Did you get him?"

Matt nodded, "Yep he's in jail." He took her in his arms and kissed her, then looked down at his sleeping son, and gently kissed his forehead.

After hanging up his hat, coat and gun belt, Matt sat down, and taking Kitty by the hand pulled her down onto his lap. She could tell that he had something on his mind, and looked at him quizzically. He took a small box from his pocket and handed it to her. She accepted it with a smile, "What's the occasion, Cowboy?"

Matt looked at her seriously saying softly, "Open it and you'll find out."

She lifted the lid and resting on red satin fabric was his marshal's badge.

She looked up, but before she could say a word he spoke, "Kitty, I've been thinking about these words all the way home." He took a breath. "Kitty thank you for being with me, staying with me through everything for all these years. When I was young I saw so much destruction from lawlessness that I needed to try to balance the scales. I've just finished 20 years, and finally feel like I've done my part. 20 years - that's enough for me, and I know more than enough for you. I just want you to know, I couldn't have done it without you. I love you and I'm honored to have your love.

Kitty smiled through tears, "Matt, I'm proud of what you've done, and proud to have been part of it. Now it's time for us, us and James, and maybe one or two more – you never know.

Matt pulled her close and kissed the women who held his heart and soul. She kissed him back long and deeply.

They had shared so much of their past, that their love had reached the point where bumps in the road were met with understanding, and the idea of forgiveness no longer even necessary. Now they had found the future. A future filled with the richness that a love like that would bring.

The End

Author's Note: I put this story, up to epilogue at the end of season 19, and the epilogue at the end of season 20.


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